I need to stop looking at my calendar. Really.
Every time I open it up, I get intimidated by everything I need to get done and all the places I need to be. I look at everything going on and think: When will I have time to sleep? How will I ever get laundry done? Will I be able to get those books back to the library before it closes? Will I even be able to read those books before I return them? Who will miss me if I skip out on that event?
And my calendar doesn't even take into account all the reality TV I want to be watching or the old episodes of Quantum Leap I still haven't finished.
Instead of methodically prioritizing and completing the items on my calendar, I go into hibernation. Instead of getting things like writing and eating done during "normal business hours," I realize I'm hungry at 9 p.m. or wake up at 2 a.m. to change a word in my WIP because my character has the latest Mac desktop in her room, not a television.
No kidding, that's why I'm awake right now. I couldn't go to sleep out of fear I would forget to change that one little detail.
One detail I won't be forgetting this weekend? My very first writing conference for SCBWI. I'm really excited for expert panels, writing workshops, manuscript critiques. But in a way I'm also really nervous. It's like this is me saying, "Here I am world! Judge me!"
Wish me luck, and wish me sleep. And don't be offended if I miss your calls because I'm sleeping at 8 p.m. rather than watching The Bachelorette like a normal human being.
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